Lady Luck and her husband are a married couple who are chastity lifestyle enthusiasts.
They were some of the first early adopters to try KINK3D's original Cobra cage when it launched in 2019 — and the products they ordered from us back then are still going strong, 6 years later!
By: Lady Luck
Hello! This is Lady Luck and her husband. We're a regular couple like so many others, who’ve discovered a love for chastity and come to appreciate its incredible benefits for our sex life and relationship.
I first learned about male chastity almost 7 years ago when my husband introduced me to the idea. At first I was apprehensive, mostly out of concern for his safety (I am a very nurturing wife!). It was a lot to wrap my mind around, that my man actually wanted me to deny him orgasms and take away his pleasure. Not to mention that he wanted to wear a physical cage during these periods of denial.
As someone who's always been naturally drawn to dominance and submission, I was instantly curious. But he could tell it was also a bit intimidating for me. I appreciated that he gave me plenty of space and time to wrap my mind around it, so it never felt rushed or pressured. He also found some online guides that gave me ideas on how the whole dynamic could work, as well as explaining why somebody would want to entertain this kink in the first place. This was all really helpful, and allowed us to find our path with this kink very naturally.
I’m often asked how I got into the mindset of enjoying the keyholder role. For people who’ve never heard of chastity play or don’t know much about it, I think it can be a big surprise to learn that, more often than not, it’s the man in a relationship who initiates the excitement about having his penis locked up. And if his partner is the sort of woman who is drawn to more stereotypically masculine or dominant traits, she may not know how to react!
With any relationship, especially those that participate in kink, I’ve always thought it’s important to be open-minded and willing to give and take. If your man has a chastity fetish, but it’s something that you don’t automatically find sexy, you have a few options:
#1 - You can participate but without necessarily enjoying it yourself. This might make your man happy in the short term, but since it isn’t doing anything for you, it may start to feel like more of a chore. Usually, you’ll both pick up on this discrepancy. Eventually your man will get frustrated because you aren’t into it, and you will get frustrated because it always feels like a task to participate in his kink. He may even want to lock himself up at inconvenient times, like when you want to have sex with him.
#2 - You can request to pass on this particular kink, setting a boundary and refraining from any type of engagement. This may disappoint your man, but consent and boundaries are the foundation for any sexual activities, and in a healthy relationship there are certain activities that you just aren’t going to be into. This is totally okay, and we all have our limits and interests! A potential compromise could be to allow him to explore this kink independently on his own time, as long as it doesn’t interfere with your relationship or the sex life that both of you have agreed upon.
#3 - You can educate yourself on it, try to understand why he is interested in it, and see if there's a side to it that also connects for you. In the case of chastity, it's a kink that can be very intimidating on the first approach. He wants to put himself in a device that makes quite a visual impression and deny himself from having regular sex with me? To many women, this can cause so much confusion initially. After all, why wouldn’t my masculine man want to enjoy my sexual attention? Does he not want to have sex with me?
Learning to love it
Chastity is one of those kinks that requires research and effort from both parties. But when done properly, it can lead to new levels of attention from your man, heightened sexual energy, and perks that men aren’t always good at explaining to their partner when chastity is first being introduced.
I consider myself a switch, meaning I enjoy both submissive and dominant activities. I’ve found that chastity has brought out the dominant side, however it also allows me to channel that dominance in a way where I still maintain my feminine energy and desires. For example, if I’d like to have sex with my man and be dominated myself as we used to do, I can simply request him to unlock and fuck me how I want! The difference is instead of him using sex to reach climax primarily for his own pleasure, now when we have sex, it is entirely focused on my pleasure. This may sound unusual if you are by nature a giving partner like I am, but this may be exactly the mindset that your partner is looking for when he’s locked up. You can use this dynamic to your advantage, locking and unlocking him when you want to have sex, keeping him ready and waiting for the next time you want his attention.
I never expected to have a dominant side come out with my husband. But our exploration of chastity play has truly empowered me and opened my eyes to how much influence I can have over him. And that influence comes with many benefits! When you take on the role of holding his key, you become the primary focus of all of his sexual energy. At first this was all so strange for me because I had grown up being taught to please your man. But once I got over the initial hesitation, it became very exciting for me and fulfilling for us both.
It’s been said many times before, but I cannot over-emphasize the importance of communication. One thing that really helped us grow in this kink was taking long road trips together, where we could talk for hours about our desires, boundaries, and what we were and weren’t into. We also loved listening to podcasts that covered topics like male chastity, threesomes, swinging, and more.
When we first began to introduce chastity officially into our sex life, it was often for very short periods. Initially, we would play with it on him for a few hours, and then I would let him out due to concerns for his comfort and safety. These sessions were good for both of us, because it provided a low-pressure environment to see how we enjoyed the newfound dynamic between us where I was in charge.
So, once we had established that we were both enjoying our experiments with chastity, that he truly wanted me to have power over his orgasms and enforce a dynamic of denial, and also that it was safe to do so for longer periods of time, we wanted to begin the search for a cage that could be worn more comfortably and for longer stretches. Luckily for us, this was right around the time that KINK3D was originally prototyping and sending out the first ever Cobra cages.
There was a lot of appeal to the design and what these cages could offer. First of all, they were lightweight and very strong. This is great, because the default choice for so long in this space when it comes to longterm wear had been steel cages — which while sexy in their own right, aren’t always the most practical for travel, as well as being much heavier and having their own issues when it comes to comfort.
We decided to make the jump to the original Cobra cage, and thanks to the sizing guides, soon we had the most comfortable and lightest cage yet! We were instantly impressed, and started our first week-long lockup with no issues.
Eventually my husband discovered that he could sleep overnight fairly easily in the Cobra cage, so we had a few short periods of 24/7 chastity soon into our exploration. We even participated in Locktober that year, which we did by locking him for two 2-week periods with a short break in between.
We also have a bit of an exhibitionist kink, so finding small public displays of chastity were very appealing. The key that opens the cage is a natural choice for this kind of exhibitionism, however the keys that come with many of the barrel style locks that fit in chastity cages are a bit on the questionable side, so my husband found a beautiful heart-shaped key that we still wear today. I find that wearing at least one item on me that symbolizes the commitment between us, maybe a goddess necklace, an ankle charm, or a key if you’re feeling bold, really helps me stay in the dominant mindset when we have him locked away in the cage.
There are so many benefits that I never would have expected. When we do have sex or are even just lounging around the house, he is much more sexually energized. Being locked keeps him in a state of grabbing at me constantly. It’s really wonderful when you’ve built the trust and foundation to truly enjoy a kink like this.
It’s also very important to check in with your partner to make sure that they still feel loved and involved. For some, denial might include not letting them see you in lingerie or touch you sexually, but for others it’s exactly the opposite, edging or teasing them mercilessly and keeping the sexual energy high and constantly at the top of their mind. As you practice, you’ll find ways to play with your man that keep him grasping for you daily.
So where are we now?
After about 7 years of practicing male chastity as an on-and-off kink, we arrived at the conclusion this year that we would like to explore a full FLR (Female Led Relationship) with 24/7 chastity. We’re so excited to share our journey with people as we move forward in this new dynamic.
We hope to be a source of real information and experience that other couples in similar situations can talk to and reference when exploring their own journeys with this kink. It’s one of those special kinks that can really bring you closer as a couple, and has many benefits outside of the purely sexual kinds. We also decided to create chastity-related content that we hope will be sexy as well as inspiring!
If you’d like to find out more about us, our lifestyle, and our story, follow us on Reddit. We’re u/LockedByLadyLuck.
Thank you so much to KINK3D for creating this wonderful cage, allowing us to participate safely, and giving us the chance to share our story here. It’s been a very exciting 7 years, and we are looking forward to a lifetime of great sex, high sexual energy, and a never-ending passion for each other through a very special commitment.
Happy locking! <3